Not Minot, not Norge GK! 56572 (Lake Wobegon of Otter Tail County)

A Prairie Home Companion
New Posts to the Host

Dear Garrison,
I've enjoyed your show for many years and hoped to book a place on one of your cruises. This year the cruise goes to Norway — a country that is currently participating in hunting and killing whales. Can we find an excuse for this action, in view of alternative products, energy and food available to such a progressive country?

PLEASE BOYCOTT NORWAY (and other countries like Japan and Iceland) UNTIL THEY STOP KILLING WHALES. Please help this worthy cause and reconsider your trip, as you have a powerful voice in the world. Thank you for everything.

Nancy G.
Portland, OR

There are two sides to this issue, perhaps more, and the Norwegians present their side at their Web site which strikes me as reasonable and worthy of some respect. The Canadians are bludgeoning baby seals, the French are force-feeding geese, the English are harassing foxes, and the Mexicans are torturing bulls. And here we are, waging this war in Iraq that goes on and on and on. For Americans to condemn Norwegians takes a certain, hmmmmm, chutzpah, no? Everybody has blood on their hands, even the Danes. (Talk to the Greenlanders about them.) I boycott some things ----- I've never set foot in the Mall of America and I refuse to eat veal and I prefer "fair trade" coffee and organic dairy products and eggs and meat and I try to patronize independent bookstores (thereby, in effect, boycotting chains) ---- but do realize there is something quixotic in it. Lovely and noble, but only a gesture. I look forward to Norway, where I've been several times, and cruising the coast and listening to the Kreutzer Quartet play Grieg and the jazz band Kustbandet play "Vil Du Kom Hjem, Jens Jensen" and sitting in a group discussing Sigrid Undset and hearing Phoebe Hansen talk about her Norwegian-emigrant dad. Where should we go to do all of that? Minot, North Dakota?

GK

Dear GK,
You don't have to drive all the way to Minot. You can stop halfway, here in Otter Tail County. Your cruisers can enjoy the Good Life at Kaldahl's Fair Hills Resort and cruise the fjords of Pelican Lake on the Fair Hills Launch. There is a theatre with a stage for Guy's All Star Shoe Band, the Kreutzer Quintet and Kustbandet. Fair Hills has its own acting troupe called the Mexican and the Minnesotan. They are mucho caliente. Every day we will deliver to you a bus load of Somali children in need of companionship and ESL tutoring. We might be able to arrange a tour of the Barry Mansion. We could do a movie night at the Fargo Theatre - air conditioned coaches of course. We could do a day tour to the Concordia College Norwegian language camp Skogfjorden up in Bemidji. Stop at the Headwaters on the way home with a wild rice hot dish at Douglas Lodge. After dinner a cruise on the fjords of Lake Itasca with after dinner drinks. As far as we know there are no whales or other protected species in Pelican Lake. With the Current Occupant's plans to extend the stay of local National Guard Units until July you could do no charge USO type of show for spouses and families who haven't seen Dad or Mom in a long time and especially for those parents whose children flew home in the belly of the Northwest Airbus. We could even invite the Current Occupant to attend. With the Current Occupant's surge plans this is not a good summer for a surge of Americans abroad, not even to Norway, not even on a cruise ship.

Our Chamber of Commerce could use a shot in the arm. Chamber Jane, our seventy plus Executive Director got sacked this week. We need something big to rally the troops around, to get us back up on the rails. We can supply all the lutefisk, lefse and Linie Aquavit you might need.

Fly everybody into Fargo.
We'll pick you up.
Mayor Walaker will be there to greet you.
Smorgasbord dinner downtown at Sons of Norway.
Tour of the Hjemkomst Viking Ship.

Bli' hjemme, kom hjem GK.

Let us know.

56572 Blog